Monday, 19 January 2015
For all the children who are about to indulge in drugs, think again!
Come on kids. I m not born as a parents, you were born to us and I became the parents, with lots of joy but without any experience and enough knowledge about how to handle you. But handle you, we did, learning all the way and satisfying all your wants and not letting you get hurt in any ways. And your wants and behaviour kept changing as a baby, as a toddler and as a teenager.
Parenting does not have a template that would work for all. We, the humans are made in such a way that each one of us differs from each other; all are unique in their own way with unique wants and requirements. For that matter the requirement of the siblings differs creating yet another hurdle for the parents because gaining experience after having the first child helps a little for the second child and the third and more.
The only thing that we as a parents could do is, not to do whatever that we did not liked, done to us, by our parents. But as we grew up we came to realize that, what we did not like being done to us as a child, were that best things that our parents had done to us. It is the point of view that changed all that and I m grateful for my parents for not allowing me to do what I wanted to do. I want to make you feel the same. Please give me a chance.
For example I never liked going to school, I was beaten up by my parents to send me to school unlike kind parents of some of my friends. I hated that, and thought that I will never impose such things to my child when I become parents. Their not giving me enough money had taught me, how to be judicious while handling money. Their not allowing me to eat the junk food made me healthy and look great. They were not wrong at all.
See now, how can I not do the same things to you? And others like giving toffee and sweets and allowing children to roam freely without care. You may not like it my kid, but I know you will be thankful to me as I m to my parents for their unkindness which made me what I m today. My friends, whose parents were kind to them when they were small would not be reading this, let alone writing.
Now a days, there are so many things that you could do to make me regret my actions, before you realize how good it is to you, all the disdainful thing that I m doing it for you. You may consume drugs, you may consume alcohol, you may eat tablets, and you may sniff some substance because of my unkind action that would be kind action later if you persevere.
If you indulge in all that I would be the saddest parent ever and all my effort of caring for you and not allowing you to fall in the fire and water would be in vain and my inexperience as a parent would be stripped bare to the world; but that does not make you winner my dear. The honour of our family would be gone to dogs. I will be afraid to help you again, for you may not like that and may resort to some other grave things.
I m learning as just as you are learning, please communicate with me and tell me what you do not like. I may not agree to all your terms because, so many years that you have in front of you that many years I have behind me and I m your parent on top of that. Please give me that edge and try to follow my advice and not only let me win my argument but try to understand me, despite blaming on the generation gap and all the gap that, you young-people are fond of referring to. Closing the generation gap is in your hand. And I expect you to adjust with me and not the other way round.
At the first place who created that gap? It is us the parents to make your life comfortable and easy. We could have left undeveloped so that there won’t be any generation gap. But we parents are not like you and we cannot take the refuge in all the substances that you know by heart.
Please try to persevere and try to do well and never give up. I m too old to help you and you may not like my company in front of your young friends. I do not want to make you feel ashamed, by meeting with you in presence of your young and good looking friends. I will be watching you from far and use this small device ummm mobile, to make you come to me when I feel like touching you, please do not get angry with me and try to talk softly I have good ears still.
You are like my investment and if you are gone I would have nobody here on this planet. Please don’t die before death. All my efforts are for you and only you my dear. Not getting a job or not doing equally with the friends is not the end of world. If you can please consider me as your moral support, I will be there rock solid behind every effort of yours. Now that you are grown up you can do whatever you like. Other than dying before your death and becoming a living corpse. That would be a severe punishment for my fragile body and mind to bear and I did not rear you to give me this problem. If you cannot be good to be please at least try, not to give me burden and let me exit the world with peace.